Women, no matter what type, have a tendency to
unintentionally push a man's buttons in the
beginning of a relationship. This usually leads
to the "Where did I go wrong?", and by this
time, he's most likely to avoid any questions
you insist on asking him about it. There are
ways to avoid this, and there are ways to get
your questions answered without having him
realize he's opening up. Which is a subject in
itself. I am going to keep this as short, and
sweet as possible.
These are 10 mistakes women tend to make with
their beaus in the beginning, or start of a
relationship, that usually get the break-up ball
rolling. These are in no particular order, as
they can vary in damage from each man. Just try
to make a little note of them, and if you catch
yourself in the process of making one, step back
and ask yourself if you might regret your
actions later on.
1. Ladies, men generally know it is their "responsibility" to make the
phone calls.
Unless they are extremely insecure, in which case
why would you bother anyway, they will call you if
they want to talk to you. They will also return your
calls to them, if they want to talk to you. Trust in
this, if he is into you, he WILL call. If he
doesn't, then be over it. You will only annoy him,
and there is no turning back from being annoying.
This has never failed, and it never will. I know
it's hard to fight the urge, but this is worth it in
the end.
2. I know it's tempting when your snuggled close together to want to
talk about your relationship, and find out where you
stand in all this madness.
First off, men are more action oriented when it
comes to love, the fact he is snuggling with you is
his way of showing you he cares about you. Don't
ruin it by trying to analyze things. You'll find him
scooting over and bringing that arm back from around
your shoulders real quick. Talking about feelings
makes it all too much a reality for a man, and he
will close up. You might find a sensitive one here
and there, but better safe than sorry.
3. Stop asking questions about his past girlfriends.
A question or two about why they broke up is fine,
you have a right to know if she tried to kill him.
But, too many questions about them can lead to all
sorts of problems, that is including a
reconciliation. You get him thinking about those
good old days, and she might be the one he's calling
tomorrow.
4. Make it a habit of stepping outside yourself if you find that you
have been babbling on and on.
Most men will listen for a while, but when you start
going into how you like to dress your cat for the
fall season, you might want to just show him
Fluffy's wardrobe instead of describing it for two
hours.
5. Here's an important one, at least in the beginning, don't shed any
tears.
If you've caught a sad movie, he'll find it
endearing, but if your sobbing because he forgot
to hold your hand or kiss you goodbye, you are
turning him off for sure.
6. This is an oldie, but a goodie.
Don't be so available. If you have been out a few
times, the next time he asks, say you have plans.
He's not going to give up asking you out because you
have a life. Also, if he says he is going out with
the boys tell him how cute you think it is, and that
you hope they tear it up and have a wild time. You
will score points with this, and he'll be thinking
about you while he's out. I guess you could say
you're putting a little reverse psychology at work
here, but this is almost always a fail proof tactic.
7. Okay Ladies, let's talk about Hallmark cards, greeting cards, and
just about any card you can think of. (Handmade
Included)
Unless it's a birthday, in which case, you
should get something funny and just sign your
name, don't give your guy cards with a short
novel written in them, or your latest poetry.
This is also including those long drawn out
letters, and if your far away a letter is okay,
but stay away from the hand to hand kind. Every
man I know cringes at the thought of these. I
know you want to pour your heart out, but it's
too much for a man to swallow when your first
starting out. If he sends them to you, then you
can send them back to him with no worries. But,
this is highly unlikely, I'm afraid.
8. Most men know that the "I forgot my (fill in the blank )at your
place" trick, is a sham.
Unless he's never had any dealings with women, he
knows what your trying to do here. If he wants you
to leave your things at his place, he'll say " Why
don't you just leave that here?" This can really
creep some men out. If it really is an accident,
they will know you didn't mean it. It's a good idea,
though, to check and make sure you have everything
to avoid him mistakenly thinking you did it on
purpose.
9. Unless he asks you, DON'T show up at his work.
This should be pretty self explanatory. It's a bad
idea on so many levels.
10. And last but not least, do not bring up marriage, and all your
hopes for a huge family.
If he asks, trust that he's not looking for all
the dreams you had when you were 12 years old
about your wedding day, and the gown you
designed. Do not talk about what your kids would
look like, and how you would raise them together
to be good caring citizens. If he initiates this
kind of talk, then you can play around with the
topic, but keep it a fun conversation, or he
will be dreading he ever brought it up. Unless
your a mail order bride, and going over your
arrangements, this is something you should avoid
drumming up a conversation about.
These are 10 mistakes I see over, and over
again. They are made in many different ways, but
almost always have the same negative result. The
most important thing to remember is that men are
different, and they just don't move to the same
beat as our drum. It's always the best attack to
not be like all the other girls who made him
uncomfortable, and just let him have a good
time. In the beginning, let him hold the keys to
all the doors that lead to the "feeling" rooms.
He will open them when he's ready, and lock them
for good if you constantly knock on them.
