All
females need sexual tension from a prospective or
existing partner to consider having or continuing to
have, a physical relationship with them. Lose this
from the start and you will become mayor of the
friend zone.
Definition of sexual tension - Cocky and funny. A
loud mouth, walking the thin line of winding her up
without overly offending her. Posing as a challenge
and not doing everything she says without a bit of
give and take.
No sexual tension = a dead relationship.
There are 4 general types of
relationship.
THE FRIEND ZONE RELATIONSHIP
Familiarity without sexual tension. (Usually the
male not opening his mouth to challenge a girl he
REALLY fancies.) This leads to complacency in that
the female becomes numb to the presence of the male
(because he doesn't stimulate her emotionally
through lack of communication) and associates him as
a social partner only. This leads to, the friend
zone. The male is permanently seen as a non sexual
friend only. Once a female has made up her mind that
you are a friend and she says the F word. It is the
kiss of death for any attraction you have for her.
You will never have a physical relationship with her
from this point onward and will spend the rest of
your time with her, hearing how she got off with
this great guy at the weekend. All the while you're
dying inside. When you eventually tell her how you
truly feel and she rejects you. She will sit and
wonder why you are not answering the phone any more
as you were a great listener to her problems.
PURLEY PHYSICAL ATTRACTION
Purely physical attraction. After a while a lack
of sexual variety leads to complacency in both
parties. Boredom / lack of sexual tension makes both
parties become fed up with each other quickly. This
leads to a breakup of the relationship and both
parties go their separate ways. This type of
relationship can be prolonged if both parties are
willing to explore their sexual fantasies and keep
variety in the bedroom. The long term feasibility of
such a relationship is still in question.
PHYSICAL ATTRACTION & SEXUAL TENSION
Physical attraction + sexual tension equals love
at first site. Female tries to change male to her
ideal image of a man. The male resists, lack of
conformity equals continued sexual tension which
equals a long lasting relationship viewed as love in
a love hate relationship.
PHYSICAL ATTRACTION & SEXUAL TENSION VERSION 2
Physical attraction + sexual tension equals love
at first site. Female tries to change male to her
ideal image of a man. The male conforms and no
longer poses a challenge. Female gets bored as
there's no sexual tension any more. Relationship
starts to slip. Male thinks everything is ok as he
is doing everything she wants but in reality, she
has lost all interest in him. It is at this point
that she will either stay with him in a purely
partnership arrangement or leave him as soon as a
better male comes along that stimulates her
emotionally.
THE OVER POSSESSIVE PARTNER
The above scenarios do not take into account over
possessive partners that bully or smother their
partners to the point that they leave or attack
them. This is known in some circles as 'a bunny
boiler'. So named after the film fatal attraction
where an obsessed Glenn Close cooks the family's pet
rabbit in a revenge attack for Michael Douglas
spurning her advances after a brief sexual
relationship.
Usually over possessiveness stems from the
insecurities or lack of trust in one partner. (They
may have been hurt in the past and are determined to
not let it happen again, to the point where it
becomes an obsession.) Or they're a total psycho,
run for it!
Relationship number 4 is the most common. In
general you will see it while at the shopping
center. The husband pushes the trolley and every
time the wife speaks, it's either yes dear or no
dear. The husband has conformed to do what the
female requires in order to have a quiet life. The
female thinks she is superior, in control and has
mastered the art of man handling.
In reality she is destroying the mans animal
attraction to her. She is slowly numbing him into an
affair with someone else. Little does she know it
but as he no longer poses a challenge to her, she is
slowly becoming numb to him. As his animal instinct
is tamed and he finds her attractive less and less,
they will suddenly, one day, find themselves in a
loveless marriage.
They will at this point be co-existing in a
purely partnership based relationship for the sake
of survival or because of children. This has lead to
relationships breaking up after 30 years of marriage
and both partners wonder why their marriage is so
lifeless.
It has been described as 'the spark fizzling
out'. In reality it is the lack of sexual tension or
sexual variety. Remember, a female thinks with her
emotions and a man thinks with his?..err?.physical
attraction mechanism.
If a male no longer stimulates her emotionally,
she will seek it elsewhere. Equally if a female is
no longer sexually attractive to a man, he too will
look elsewhere.
Don't get me wrong ladies, some things can't be
reversed, like aging and the passage of time, but
there are ways to grow old and still be sexy to a
male partner. A boring sex life is a recipe for
disaster and being sexy is more than a lack of
wrinkles. If in doubt, it's time to start
experimenting in the bedroom to see what pushes his
and your buttons. Explore each others sexual
fantasies and do things you only dream about at
night while your partner is asleep. You'll be
surprised how quickly your relationship bounces back
as a result.
If you have any sense you will heed my warning
weather you are male or female, married or just
starting a relationship. Try to keep the sexual
tension alive between the two of you. If not, you
will be on the next train to dumpsville wondering
why he or she slept with someone else.
