Up
until a few months ago, I always looked at
"alpha males" in completely negative terms. I
saw them as pretentious, obnoxious, cocky and
arrogant. The only reason they got women, I
thought, was because women are lame, dense, and
go for pricks. The alpha males - success has
nothing to do with them, I said, and everything
to do with nice girls, going for bad boys.
But over the last few months, my attitude has
changed. I've actually found that adopting an
"alpha attitude" is crucial towards attracting
women. In fact, the guys who do best with women
aren't necessarily jocks; they're just the ones
who are assertive, ambitious, confident and
clever: in short, they are decidedly alpha.
What transformed my perception? Well, it was a
best friend who taught me - man's best friend,
to be exact. My attitude changed as a result of
none other than learning about dog training.
Alpha-dog training, to be exact.
Here's what I discovered: As dogs today are
still pack animals, with the same instincts as
"a pack of wolves," it's important for dog
owners to behave like the "Alpha", or leader, of
the group. In the wild, dogs would follow a
structure, and in the absence of a solid "alpha"
leader, the "beta's" and "omega's" of the pack
would rebel. So as a dog owner, if you don't
make it clear to the dog that YOU are the leader
- by eating first, going through doorways first,
etc. - it's all over from there: these wolf-like
creatures are going to do the complete opposite
of what you tell them to, and even become
aggressive and untame.
Sounds kind of like what happens if you
let girls run all over you, doesn't it?
However, if you are firm and consistent in
asserting yourself as the Alpha of your dog's
"pack" (ie, the family household), he will
respect you and do what he or she is told.
You'll avoid so many problems, just by taking
the time to show a dog that YOU are the boss.
Because, much like women, dogs WANT someone
who's in control. They don't wan't to have take
up the role of leader themselves. They'll
actually love you more when you walk around with
pride and confidence.
There's more we can apply to female attraction
from alpha dog training. When a low-ranking dog
rebels against the "top dog," successful dog
trainers do the same things alpha wolves do in
the wild: they ignore the dog for a couple days,
until it comes back apologetic and willing to do
what it is told. If the dog acts well upon
return, he is rewarded and given the
socialization and attention he needs.
As you'll learn below, you can use this
same principles towards ladies you meet at a bar
or club.
Of course, you can't go overboard. A dog that
obeys out of fear does not behave as well as a
dog who behaves out of respect. In fact, it's
been found that being too assertive and physical
with a dog will only lead to aggressive and
reckless behaviors. So it pays to be firm, but
not brutal. Just like with the ladies - you want
to be confident and assertive, but not arrogant
and mean.
Here are some more benefits to carrying
"alpha attitude" around the ladies:
By asserting yourself as the leader - someone to
be respected, not feared - you gain people's
respect. As I said, females don't want to have
to adopt male leadership themselves; they just
want to be around someone who's not afraid to be
a stand-up, assertive kind of man. But let me be
clear: women don't want an insecure guy who
feels he has to act macho and sexist to get his
buddies' approval, like so many jocks, but a guy
who naturally acts confident, and expects people
to show him respect. That's what you're aiming
for, and that's what women who are worth your
time want.
Conversely, by being the "follower" instead of
the "followed," people, especially girls, will
treat you as what you present: someone who's not
a leader, someone who's NOT confident, tough,
and full of power; in short, someone who's not
full of value. You get what you give, so it's up
to you to GIVE a lot!
When a girl, particularly one you've just met at
a bar or any social venue, treats you with
disrespect, it's up to you, as the "alpha male,"
to ignore her. Shut her out, move on, and she'll
eventually come back to you the same way a dog
would: with her tail between her legs,
apologetic, and hungry for your respect. But
don't address her until you're sure you have her
respect, otherwise you're allowing her to "move
up the pack," which, as with dogs, will only
create future problems.
This actually goes to show why guys who ignore
girls, get more than those who dote on them and
act needy.
It's all evolutionary.
Conversely, when a girl treats you well, gives
you love, and yes, does as she's told (though
I'm not suggesting you guys bark out commands!),
you must treat HER with respect. This especially
applies to girlfriends, but also a girl you've
only known or dated shortly: Show your thanks,
show your appreciation, the same way an alpha
leader would display love and affection upon a
well-behaved canine.
You can even apply the alpha dog training to
dates. Since the alpha leader eats first,
chooses what to eat, and eats the biggest
portions, YOU must decide where to eat on a date
(don't let her choose the restaurant!), you
mustn't be afraid to eat first (although social
conventions do dictate that we must wait for
both our plates to be served!), and you should
get the best bites. If you're splitting a piece
of cheesecake, for example, don't be afraid to
dig in and get the best portion! The girl will
actually respect you for it, much more so than
if you bashfully gave up the best piece to her.
Again, retain your position as the "top dog."
Finally, you have to show that you're an alpha
not just one-on-one, but also in groups. An
alpha wolf doesn't gain his position by
submitting to others in the pack; he asserts
himself in front of others and makes it known
that he's the leader. That doesn't mean you
treat your buddies and strangers like crap; it
just means you don't let them push you around.
In short, you must be what the guy I think has
the whole "alpha attitude" down pat, Carlos Xuma,
calls "being a stand-up guy." That means
standing up for yourself , AND standing up for
your girl, by not taking crap from anyone. You
don't have to be a jock to let people know they
can't push you around.
Quite the contrary. Xuma knows that in order to
be big, you've gotta THINK big, and he does this
himself by adopting alpha characteristics. What
are some great alpha characteristics? In his
Secrets to Becoming the Alpha Man course, Xuma
rattles off a number of them, including being:
- Clever/smart/cunning
- Ambitious
- Excited
- Honorable
- Dominant (not aggressive, but demonstrating
superior social skills)
- Stable
- Fit (healthy lifestyle)
- Curious
- Balanced
- Natural
Doesn't sound like you? No worries. With Xuma's
course you can learn how to NATURALLY become the
leader. It all starts with attitude. Carlos
teaches some fascinating, real-life subjects
like:
- Qualification: The Essence of Alpha
Attitude
- REAL Game Philosophy
- Three Winning Attitudes to Impress Women
- 5 Things to Never Talk About with Women
- The Keys to Dating Success
- Motivating Yourself to Get More Girls
- How Even Geeks Can Get "10's" with Alpha
Attitude
- What Bad Boys Have That Nice Guys Don't
I highly recommend trying Xuma out. You can
start with his free mini-course and newsletter,
and see how you like it. I personally find it
fascinating and down-to-earth gritty.
In short, it pays to be alpha. The best part is,
You don't have to be a football player to do it.
The lasting reward is feeling good about
yourself, and getting the girls all the other
alpha males get. What's wrong with that?
